Thursday, October 13, 2011

8 Months Drama-Free

I don't know about you guys, but for me, Facebook used to be a near-constant source of drama in my life. (As evidenced by the number of posts regarding my Facebook drama.) For a long time it seemed like I couldn't go a month without some sort of controversy taking up space in my brain. Someone would get offended by a post about breastfeeding, threads were getting hijacked out of nowhere over any random assortment of issues you can think of, names were called, and all the other fun forms of havoc caused by internet drama were all taking place on my wall.

I am incredibly happy to say that the last bout of drama was back in February. I am thankful to say that there has been very little drama of any sort in my life since then. I've spent some time thinking about the reasons for this, what changes I might have made, in order to understand better where the drama was coming from in the first place.

But the more I look, the more confused I am. I haven't changed much in the past eight months, and neither has my social networking. I don't post quite as frequently, but I still do post on Facebook multiple times each day. I don't post a lot about breastfeeding anymore, but I do still talk about it there from time to time. I've edited my friends list over the past several months, but I've really only eliminated 15-20 people.

One thing I do know I can attribute to the lack of drama is that I have placed a stricter filter on the way I respond to people. I still say what I want to say, but I try to be more tactful and respectful of other's feelings. I'm not saying that before I would just say whatever I wanted without any regard at all for others, but I can definitely see where a lot of the times I had problems could be caused by my lack of consideration that something might be taken the wrong way.

But that still doesn't account for the random, drive-by hijacking of posts. Don't get me wrong, just because I don't know why that's stopped doesn't mean I'm not appreciative of the fact. It's definitely no fun getting blind-sided like that.

I guess though, it probably just comes down to the people that I allow in my life, on Facebook as well as otherwise. One of the biggest complaints among the people I had it out with was that I posted too much: too much about breastfeeding, about cloth diapering, pictures of my kids, what I'm doing for the day, what I'm making for dinner, etc. ...You know, the kind of stuff that interests me. See, I always thought that the point in social networking was to share these details, the things that interest you, and to experience the interests of those you care about. My mother joined Facebook so that she could see pictures of my kids and read about what my family is up to. Should I stop sharing that information because a few people think I'm clogging the feed with my posts? Or should I get rid of the people who obviously aren't interested? I think, in the end that's the question I found myself facing. And when it's put in terms like that, I think it's fairly easy to figure out what steps to take.

I don't know how many of you experience Facebook drama the way that I have, but it's really not worth the time. I find myself breathing a sigh of relief every now and again when I realize I've made it another day/week/month without that kind of drama. Real life is dramatic enough. Facebook should be the least of your worries.

Just a note to anyone who is on my blogroll (or would like to be), I will be updating it over the next week or so. Most blogs that have gone without update in the last 3 months will be removed (unless you'd like to stick around, in which case just comment and let me know), and some new blogs will be added. If you want your blog to be featured or you have any suggestions, please let me know. I'd be happy to add you.